Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Year 3

Dear Jerry,

Three years ago today, we made some pretty huge promises to each other in front of a mass of our family and friends. At the time, I don't think either one of us really knew what we were in for, but we knew we wanted to do it together.

And that's all that mattered.

We've had some momentous life changes since then. First Toby, then our fixer-upper house, then Allison. With each addition, we've accrued a heaping truckload of responsibilities, but we make it work. Sure, sometimes the dirty dinner dishes sit on the counter overnight, but that's because we looked at each other, smiled and said, "Screw it. Let's do something fun."

And whether we take a walk, watch a movie or get ice cream, I never regret it the next morning when I'm dealing with hardened barbecue sauce remnants and a pile of crusty utensils. I just smile because putting off the mundane tasks to share a laugh with you is always worth it.

For Mother's Day, my mom got me a book of advice "Mother to Daughter." In it are single thoughts for moms to help them raise amazing women. Every once in awhile, I flip through it for inspiration, and the one that stands out most in my mind is this: "Be good to your partner. It will shape the way your daughter grows up and forms relationships."

It's so obvious, but it really made me stop and think about what I'll tell Allison when she's old enough to start dating seriously. (You know, when she's 30.)

After much consideration, I've decided that I'm going to advise her to find someone who makes her laugh. Really laugh. In good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. For richer or poorer. 'Till death do you part.

Because of all of the things that I love about you -- your overtly caring nature, your insane work ethic, your resolute desire to make me happy -- the one I appreciate most is your ability to make me laugh. It doesn't matter if I'm feeling my worst or we've hit maximum capacity in the stress-level department, before I know it, my storm cloud is momentarily lifted when you're around. You're probably adding years to my life because of it, which just translates to more opportunities to leave dirty dishes on the counter.

Of course, there are times that we can't ditch our responsibilities. Ever-present bills, laundry, mowing and grocery shopping will kill even the most steadfast honeymooners. But you know what? With all of our little creatures underfoot and added household necessities, you've become such an amazing husband.

Just this week Allison got her first cold. And when I called you at work to say I had made her a doctor's appointment for later that afternoon, you didn't even question whether or not you'd come with me. It was just a given. I don't think I ever tell you enough how wonderful it is that you participate so fully and completely with our family.

We had to drive separately so I could go to work afterward, and as we kissed goodbye in the parking lot -- probably even a little inappropriately, but whatever, people can deal with it -- everything felt right in the world.

When you got in your car to drive away, you said, "I couldn't do this with anyone else, ya know."

I do know. I couldn't either.

So, for our anniversary, I want to let you know I still feel the same way as I did on our wedding day. I still just want to spend time with you. To share and do things with you. To revel in our memories and look forward to creating new ones.

And that's all that matters.

All my love,
Kelly

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello, Kelly. You don't know me, obviously, but I read you blog everyday. It makes me laugh, cry, and think. This is the first time I leaving a comment because your letter to Jerry touched my heart. It is the same way I feel about my honey. Your words are beautiful, Kelly. Jerry is so blessed to be able walk through life's journey with you in hand and in heart. I also have a newborn, well he is going on 8 months now, and I relate to the same experiences you have. The nursing, the diapers, the giggles, etc... Reading your blog makes my day and makes me smile. I seriously think sometimes my coworkers must think I'm nuts when I laugh out loud. Thank you for sharing your world with us.

I wish you a wonderful day and life.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful words, Kelly. Jerry is blessed to walk in life's journey with you in hand and in heart.

Timberly said...

Aw!! Happy anniversary!

Anonymous said...

That made me tear up a little bit. I love the love you two have. It's absolutely beautiful. =) Happy 3 years to you two!

Anonymous said...

I should know better by now than to read one of your letters to Alli or Jerry while I am at work. Off I go to the bathroom before someone sees me crying. BEAUTIFUL KELLY! Jerry is one lucky man and Iam sure he knows it.

Ray said...

I love how you ended it, "And that's all that matters" like you started with in the beginning. Because it's so key.

"HAPPY THREE YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO YOU KELLY AND TO JERRY!" I find it so great that you love him just as much as, the day you married him. I don't know anyone like that. But that's how it's supposed to be. If the years fly by and the love dwindles then it wasn't meant to be. But if the years go by and the love get's even stronger, then you know it was the right thing. The right thing from the very beginning.

I seriously hope to have what you and Jerry have (although I doubt I'll ever find love). May your marriage stay strong for the rest of your lives.

Take, care.

P.S. I would have love to have seen a photograph of the two of you to end this entry with (oh, well). =)

webers said...

Happy 3rd you crazy kids! Can you believe its been taht long? Jeff and I will be 3 in Dec.and some days it feels like yesterday we started this crazy love journey. All the best in the years to come!

JeffandChristy

Anonymous said...

Wow. That was really beautiful. Sounds like you made a good choice in a husband and you know it. You are both very fortunate. Guard what you have with your life.

Jaxon

theZanyOne said...

Happy Anniversary!

julie said...

Happy anniversary, Kelly and Jerry!!

Beth said...

Ah, Kelly, you know I always read you, I've mentioned you in my blog, we've even spoken online a time or two. I've often thought if we just lived in the same area, we'd be friends. (Humor me.)

So let me tell you that when you do find that one who makes you laugh, who you couldn't do this without, all the wonderful sweet things you just wrote for Jerry....it doesn't ever have to end. It can change, and usually does, and there's always gonna be ups and downs. But my own happily ever after and I are stunned to realize we've been together 25 YEARS, married almost 23. Time flies.

And there is still no one else I ever want to do this with. It's why I'm always so happy when someone else finds the right one, and begins their own happily ever after.

Happy Anniversary.

the_plainsman@xanga.com said...

First, Happy Third Anniversary Kelly and Jerry, and wishing you many, many more. You two are so lucky to have found each other, but luck had nothing to do with it, it was meant to be.

Second, Kelly, your gift with words, to be able to so perfectly reflect on your Anniversary and marriage is so special. This is right up there with your paragraphs on first meeting Jerry, his later proposal and so many more.

Have a happy rest of day today and every day thereafter.

Anonymous said...

Once again you manage to fill my eyes with tears and make me feel all warm and mushy.

I know exactly what you mean and I am lucky enough to have found someone that does the same for me.

You both are truly blessed to have found each other.

Happy Anniversary.

~ Kirs

NatalieDeltaGam said...

can you believe it's been 3 years? time just flies!

cafechick80 said...

bawling. oh man. you guys are awesome faces too!

Lisa said...

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to my favorite Pennsylvanians!!!! xo

Traci said...

This made me tear up. That's awesome.

Happy anniversary!

Erinn said...

When are you going to start your own greeting card company. You could blow Hallmark out of the water.

Happy 3rd Anniversary!!

ajandmac said...

Oh my gosh...

wow...

yes...

beauty...

thank you.